Dear (brown Executive) Diary
Today the intention is (was?) to go to a new drumming class in Sangre Grande, being taught by the stickfighters I drummed with some nights ago. But now that I am awake, I'm wondering if I will ...
Yesterday's list made me realise that my daily life has become a series of lists! I have a list for every day which more or less determines what the day will be. I have a brown diary (Executive's Weekly Minder 2007) into which I write appointments, meetings, events, deadlines, etc. as soon as they come up: (a) so I don't forget and (b) so they don't clash and overlap. Some days are chock full, some have one thing written on them ... and increasingly fewer days are empty. Every day I write down the lists on paper and walk around with the paper, crossing things off as I go along ... otherwise I forget or get side-tracked.
This feels so un-me. When did my life suddenly become a series of lists?
These lists are not full of things I necessarily want or love to do, but things I "have" to do or "should" do (I don't like using the word 'should', but I will use it here) in order to get things done. It all comes with some degree of 'responsibility' and a sense of 'organisation'.
I don't see myself as an "Executive" ... so why do I have an "Executive Minder"? It's one of those diaries people give away around Christmas because they have accumulated too many for the upcoming year. What is the symbolic relevance of organising my day-to-day life in a brown book that's "not me" and which someone gave away because they had too many and didn't need or want it?
I will make my own.
What would life be without that brown office diary and those lists-of-things-to-do? Would I remember anything that I 'have' to do? Most likely I wouldn't. So much is going on now and within the next two months. I would miss 'important' meetings and deadlines. Are they really that important??? Would there be chaos and disorganisation? I don't think so ... and definitely life would change. Daily priorities will shift. I would wake up and have a blank slate in front of me.
What would I do?
(To be continued ...)
This week's Sunday Scribblings is "Dear Diary".
Labels: sunday scribblings